Vital Signs
by emethereality
Summary: Written for the CSI Forever Online March 2016 Fan Fiction Challenge. The first line used in this story is my prompt. This is a GSR fic set in mid season 5- early season 6. Angst, fluff, a dash of humor and a bit of smut all rolled into one. This one goes out to Elena who held my hand through it. I hope you'll enjoy and review if you feel so inclined!
**A/N: Timelime is from Nesting Dolls in season 5 to Gum Drops in early season 6 with a brief mention of Butterflied from season 4. You might remember the spoilers about the "missing Gum Drops scene" that put the GSR fandom in a frenzy (before the script was changed due to Billy not being able to shoot the episode.) If you don't, the spoilers relevant to my story were: they are out of town on a case and Grissom shows up at Sara's hotel room under the pretext that his "roommate" Greg snores.**

 **Vital Signs**

 _ **Pulse**_

He reached out and found the lock in the dark.

Grissom stood there, key in hand, hesitating. He wasn't meant to use it unless it was an emergency and he couldn't be sure this was one. He couldn't be sure it wasn't one either.

Sara wasn't answering her phone or her door and it was the middle of the night which meant it was an odd time for her- for them- to be sleeping.

It had been over two days since Ecklie had suspended her, since she'd confided in him. He had expected an email, a phone call. Heck, he'd half expected her to show up at work just to piss Ecklie off.

Under any other circumstances, he wouldn't have dreamed of doing what he was about to do but he had left her in a state of distress unlike anything he had seen before. That day, he would have stayed with her as long as she would have let him. He would have spent the night, for better or worse, had she asked. But she had expressed the need to be alone. He had acquiesced but only after she promised to touch base the next day.

Grissom let himself in quietly. The apartment was brightly lit which somehow troubled him more than if he'd found it dark.

"Sara?"

A shape on the sofa caught his attention and he moved to it, only to freeze in place once he got a better look.

It was Sara, but she was oddly positioned.

Lying on her stomach, rolled in a blanket, a leg haphazardly hanging off to the side. Eyes closed, her face expressionless.

Haunting memories came back to him. _Sara- but not Sara- dead on a bathroom floor. Sara-but not Sara- laying in a morgue._

Grissom leaned forward to brush a lock of hair off her forehead and he released the breath he'd been holding when he encountered warmth. He tucked the wayward strand behind her ear and his hand lingered on her neck, unable to stop himself from checking her pulse.

Of course she was all right, if probably exhausted. She needed to rest. She deserved to sleep the night away.

And he had no right to be here.

His mind was telling him to leave, that he was invading her privacy, just as his body was taking a seat in the chair next to the couch. He would stay five minutes. Just long enough to make sure she truly was okay, and then he would leave and she would never know he'd been here at all.

Something had shifted inside of him the moment she told him about her past. As he held her hand and watched her sob, it became obvious to him that whatever he felt for her was much deeper than he ever let himself believe. It was futile to say that he only thought of her as a colleague or a friend. He had wanted nothing more than to pull her into his lap and hold her in his arms. But the last thing Sara had needed was for him to reveal himself in a moment she surely would think of as weakness.

What Sara needed right now was somebody she could trust and he very much wanted to be that person.

 _Trust didn't start with someone hovering over you when you slept._ He thought as he stood to leave.

And that's when he noticed it: two brown eyes, looking up at him from under heavy lids. He couldn't be sure how long she had been awake but her lips were pursed into an expression he could only describe as amusement.

Sara yawned then cleared her throat.

"What are you doing here?"

Her naturally husky voice sounded hoarser than usual, a painful reminder for Grissom of the emotional breakdown he had witnessed.

He sat back down, racking his brain for an appropriate answer.

"Nothing-" was all he could get out.

"Oh." There was that smirk again. "Because I thought you might have been watching me sleep."

He cocked an eyebrow at her. "I will not confirm nor deny."

"Fair-"

"But you wouldn't answer your phone or your door and-"

"And the last time you saw me I was...you know."

She pointed to the empty beer bottles and tissue boxes on the counter as she sat up, letting the blanket pool at her waist.

"Don't worry, I would have done the same in your situation." She flashed him a wide grin and ran her fingers through her hair to fluff up the side tousled by sleep. Her tank top clung to all the right places and she clearly wasn't wearing a bra.

Grissom had to make a conscious effort to close his mouth as he shifted uncomfortably in the chair, willing away his body's natural reaction.

"You know what's strange?"

That come-hither tone wasn't helping his current situation.

He shook his head slowly.

"You were just in my dreams and I open my eyes and there you are." She shrugged. "It just isn't usually the case. And I'm always highly disappointed upon waking up."

Thoughts of flirting back and confessing his own nocturnal fantasies ran through his head but they weren't going to help his precarious situation so he chose a safer approach.

"Well, I hate to disappoint." He finally answered.

There was sadness in her eyes but it was fleeting and when she spoke with a cheerful tone, he convinced himself he had imagined it.

"Thank you for checking on me." She leaned over, resting her hand on his knee too briefly. "You're a good friend."

 _A good friend._ He could be. He owed her at least that.

"Um..." She gathered the blanket around her waist. "I wasn't exactly expecting company, so I'm not wearing much. Do you mind?" She gestured for him to turn around.

He looked away, reluctantly he had to admit. Whatever relationship they were attempting to build, it was hard to imagine that it could be anything but complicated.

For Sara, he would give it a try.

 _ **Heartbeat**_

They lay side by side. Eyes up to the ceiling with only the occasional side-ways glance.

"I just assumed that all rooms had two beds." Grissom's statement broke the silence and they both shifted, trying to find comfort in the awkward moment.

"It's fine." Sara's smile was almost convincing. "Greg's snoring must be pretty bad for you to come knocking at my door."

Grissom just stared at her, admiring her profile. The upturn of her nose. The curve of her chin.

She turned onto her right side, her head coming to rest in her right hand.

"While we're here might as well make it fun. We haven't gossiped about your neighbor in a while." She smirked. "Spill."

"How come we don't hang out anymore?" Grissom's voice was hushed as he spoke.

"We do..."

"Not like we used to."

The intensity of her gaze was too much so he looked away. He stared at the motel room's only window while the question hung between them.

Sara cleared her throat loudly after a moment, forcing Grissom to look back at her. She opened her mouth to speak but seemed to think better of it. She bit on her lower lip, keeping her thoughts to herself.

Turning on his left side, Grissom mimicked her stance and nodded for her to go on, bracing himself for whatever came next.

"It hurt too much to hang out with you." She finally said with the raise of an eyebrow.

The statement was rendered matter-of-factly with no obvious malice, but it hit him like a punch to the gut.

She didn't elaborate further so he took the plunge.

"For what it's worth, it meant a lot to me."

It was her turn to look away.

"I looked forward to our outings", he continued, "and-"

"It meant a lot to me, too." Sara interrupted. "But it wasn't enough…"

Her next intake of breath was shaky and it made his heart ache. Her head sunk in the pillow and she struggled to get the words out.

"Every time you called. Every time we made plans, I kept hoping this would be...it."

"It?" He was genuinely puzzled.

"I kept hoping that the next date would turn into...well, an actual date."

"Oh…"

"Yeah…"

"I wasn't sure if that's what you wanted-"

"I should have spelled it out for you. Oh wait, I did. More than once." Turning towards him, she met his eyes in the dimly lit room. "I guess that was before we started hanging out. I just didn't think I had to restate the obvious."

 _Perhaps you should have._ He wanted to say.

They'd never talked about their relationship in specific terms. It quickly became apparent that it went beyond a simple friendship. For all intents and purposes they were a couple but somehow they had managed to always fall short of crossing the line to intimacy. A fact that he had always attributed to letting her take the lead. Now he was starting to see that the ball might have been in his court the whole time.

He offered a sheepish grin and he was rewarded with a wide smile that made his pulse race. That woman did have an undeniable effect on him. The physical attraction was obvious, as proven by his current predilection, but the hold she had on his heart and soul was becoming apparent. It had for some time, of course. Maybe you did occasionally have to restate the obvious, if even just to yourself.

Grissom moved closer, slowly, until he could feel her breath on his face.

"I'm sorry, Sara. I'm not very good at... this."

She inched forward until their lips were nearly touching.

"S'okay. I don't think I'm very good at it either."

"Can't be that bad. You got me into bed."

She snorted.

"You snorted."

"I did not-"

He leaned in and pressed his lips on hers. Softly at first. He wanted to savor the moment, make it worth the wait. But then Sara's tongue slip pass his lips challenging him in a passionate duel and he let himself go. Whatever reserve Gil Grissom had, whatever doubts he still held, melted in that kiss.

He was no longer in control of his hands, they were in her hair, trying to deepen the kiss. Down her arms, seeking her warmth. They caressed her body, touching every dip and curve. When they found their way at the edge of her underwear, he gathered his senses and relinquished the comfort of her lips.

Sara pressed herself against his hand, as if sensing his hesitation.

"I think we already took care of the 'wine and dine' part."

With those words, Grissom reclaimed Sara's lips and let his fingers slip past the waistband of her underwear. He relished in the sound she made as he pressed gently against her flesh. As irresistible as she was, he put his own needs aside for the moment to concentrate on Sara's. When her head fell back against the pillow, he kissed his way down her throat and in the valley of her breasts. He teased a nipple in his mouth and she cried out. Her body started to tremble as he moved to give attention to the other breast. Before long Sara was reaching her peak and he stayed with her as she rode her climax, pressing his head against her chest, finding comfort in the rhythm of her heartbeat.

Perhaps matters of the heart were never simple.

For Sara, he would give it a try.


End file.
